Yesterday, after a long while (of almost 20 days) (* 1 year back, my physician had declared that I was suffering from “bipolar disorder“… and he had consoled me saying almost all artists suffer from this problem.. in fact,that is a sign of a brilliant creative person). So, back to our story, After a long long while, I experienced blues. Blues because I contemplated on my actions and thought patterns of the recent past and I came to the conclusion that I was absolutely disorganized…. least focused towards my goal…unable to do anything, lethargic… and worst of it, I was feeling hopeless.

Let me disclose something from the core of my heart. You know guys, I believe people who are shallow, who engage in trivial pursuits are the lucky ones. They don’t think too much and so they do not know their limitations or frustrations… of course, they pine for something else (which is most of the times, some materialistic goal) but that’s another story. People like me, who know what they are going through, feel all the more depressed. Sometimes, knowing and understanding your inner mind is a bigger danger than anything else, which is what I most of the times go through. 😦

Anyways, I am not here to talk of the negative vibes that I feel. So… back to my blues. I shared this with one of my chat friends. (This is one advantage of your chat list. The people to whom you open your heart aren’t the ones whom you meet generally. So, you can rest assured that you can be absolutely open about anything that goes on in your mind. Hence, I told him everything.) And he suggested I must go out for a walk or have a nap. The lazy person as I am always, I would have rather chosen the second option. But, to my surprise, I opted for the first.

I went for a walk. 😉 Thought, anywhich ways I have lose some extra pounds that I have put on. So, went ahead with a brisk walk to a place where I found nature, full of respite, serene and captivating.

I took my iPod with me, as I didn’t want any human voice to disturb me. I want to be alone, not lonely. 🙂 I listened to those songs which I had heard at least more than 100 times till date. But, yesterday,they sounded different..completely different. I just swayed with the rythm of the songs, the pull of the breeze. Many say, twilight brings gloom and so one musn’t be alone in the evenings. Yesterday, I experienced the opposite. 🙂

I can not word my experience. But I hope you now know what I felt, what I saw, what I heard… listening, eyeing, feeling the breeze… listening, eyeing, feeling nature…. listening, eyeing, feeling the calmer me… 🙂

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